This Sunday, in the wee early hours of the AM, the ardent cry of millions of hipsters, fanboys, and a few dozen never-nudes will be answered with the release of a 4th season of the cult sitcom, Arrested Development. Put out exclusively on Netflix and filmed a full 6 years after the original series was axed by Fox, the highly anticipated 4th season will include 15 episodes chronicling the Bluth’s exploits since the series cut.
From the moment of the announced resurrection, everyone who can form an opinion has already autopsied the decision. Can lightening strike twice? Will the show be as “good” as it once was? Should we have left it dead? At H5E, we prefer not to get sucked into that self-fulfilling pessimism and are instead enjoying this moment. What we have is rare instance when a cult object of admiration gets another shot; 15 MORE seconds of fame.
Criticism be damned; the opening chords of David Schartz’s quirky ukulele will sound the impending doom of the Nielsen ratings system (as we know it). This hearkens an unconditional victory for fans making what they want a reality through ebuzz and social media. This second coming laid the groundwork for the $5.7 million dollar Veronica Mars revival fund, crowdsourced from a Kickstarter page. An audience will fight to get what they want, and the modern incarnation of the Internet gives them a real potential to win any battle.
In preparation for whatever viewing party or event you’ve got planned, the folks at H5E offer a few things to help get you in the mood.
Arrested Development Drinking Game
Best played with a viewing party of 4+, our rules are split better beginner gags and more intensive rules for those that take their boozing and Netflix watching seriously. May still be played while watching the original seasons, these are flexible to amendment and addition.
Tobias makes an ambiguous statement, 1 drink.
Michael folds his arms as he explains something, 1 drink.
Lucille Bluth drinks, 1 drink.
Any character does a chicken impression, 3 drinks.
“Heeeeeey (family member),” 1 drink.
Cut-offs ON screen, DO NOT drink.
“Next time on…,” 1 drink.
Bible misquotes, 3 drinks.
Someone says “Pop pop,” 2 drinks.
The Narrator (Ron Howard) says “In fact,” 1 drink.
“I’ve made a huge mistake…,” FINISH your drink.
If Gene Parmesan shows up, everyone in the room must shriek with joy. Last person to scream gets 2 drinks.
Whenever George Michael fumbles with his speech, (Ex. “Bu-she-sh-but-she’s my cousin!”) sip for each fumbled word.
Whenever someone in your viewing party asks another member or the group as a whole “Get it?” in reference to a running gag from the series’ original run, that person takes 2 drinks. For an impressive chronicling of running jokes, refer to this awesome guide posted by NPR.
Whenever an incestuous joke is made, make intense eye contact with someone else in the room. First person to break the gaze has 3 drinks.
During G.O.B.’s performance music, “Final Countdown” by Europe, drink until the music cuts.
Whenever Michael and G.O.B. fight over a girl, drink your neighbor’s drink.
Whenever 2 people in your viewing party touch, yell “NO TOUCHING!” The person wearing the most orange must drink. Both drink if similar amounts of orange.
Arrested Development Caw-ka- caw-ka- caaaaaaaaawocktails
If you want to get a little inventive with your mixtures, we have a few original Bluth inspired cocktails for your sampling pleasure. These are best consumed before, after, or during a family intervention.
The Banana Grabber
“Should’ve kept animation rights…”
1 oz. Chocolate Liqueur
½ oz. Hazelnut Liqueur
1 oz. Whipped Vodka
Start with a high ball glass. Cut a piece of banana about 2 in. l and drop into empty glass. Add salt, hazelnut, and chocolate liqueur.
Half-fill with thick, cubed ice.
Add whipped vodka and fill with soda water. Garnish with a lightly salted rim if you desire.
DO NOT DRINK until you are able to grab the banana from under the ice and eat it.
“I just blue myself…”
1 oz. Vodka
1+ oz. Blue Curacao
Dash Triple Sec
Chill a martini glass. Shake ingredients slowly and pour into chilled glass. Add extra Blue Curacao if you’re feeling down…
Garnish with magical sprinkles of granulated sugar and drop a sweet, pink maraschino cherry at the bottom of the glass.
Drink until you’re the envy of every Jerry and Jane on the block.
“We have unlimited juice? This party is going to be off the hook!”
1 oz. Black Haus
1 oz. White Rum
Kool Aid Mix
In an ice filled pint glass, pour Black Haus and White Rum. Add dashes of simple syrup.
Add 2 servings worth of Kool Aid Mix. If you have the kind that isn’t mixed with sugar to begin with, double the sugar serving as well. If your mix is pre-sweetened, add sugar to taste.
Best served when mother isn’t home or at your adopted brother’s soccer games.